Partisan Politics makes Belinda Sad :-(

Apparently, Belinda was hurt by all the mean things that were said about her last week when she decided to get in bed with the Liberals (condoms boys!) .... I mean sold herself for a cabinet position... I mean showed herself to be a political whore... I mean realised that her politics were more adequately reflected by the party that is all about staying in power and not having any principles... I mean.... all of those things.

Anyway, she thinks that the reason that Canadians are tuned out of politics is how partisan it has become. In this regard I have to respect her for standing up for what she believes in: she realises that politics can't be partisan if all the politicians belong to the same party.

Whining in an interview yesterday Belinda had this to say about the response to her decision last week: "There were a lot of negative comments made, and I find that disgraceful, quite frankly." I have to say, given the audacity of this woman -- she abandoned her (supposed) principle's in return for a cushy cabinet position and she is telling people off -- she really is wasted in Paul Martin's cabinet. Surely Robert Mugabe has a job for her!

Frankly I'm rather sick of all the reaction about how we've been mean and sexist to poor Belinda. To begin with, calling someone a whore is not sexist. As a woman, I have never really identified strongly with the term 'whore' and if you do (regardless of your sex), perhaps you have some soul searching to do. And it was Belinda that decided to play dirty politics, she can't now turn around and ask that people treat her with the utmost civility. It's all very nice for Belinda that none of this really matters to her and that daddy's got her job waiting when she's bored of this politics thing, but some people actually care. And when you do the dirty on people, they tend to get upset and say mean things that make you sad. So if you can't play the game.... I don't know, you finish the sports metaphor... I'm just a girl.

Why don't we all join up?

As if allowing Peter McKay to put his penis inside her wasn't disgusting enough, Belinda has decided to go down yet another level and has joined the Liberals.

I say everyone join the Liberals and make this a one party state. Nobody cares anyway, why delay the inevitable?

How about we don't play politics with human tragedy. Deal?

On Thursday King Paul promised to send 500 troops to Sudan in order to buy David Kilgour's vote of confidence in the House of Commons. You have to love a man who suddenly cares about genocide when his job is on the line. Oh, the compassion! Unfortunately, it seems buying votes isn't as easy when you're dealing with the slaughter of innocents as when you're paying Canadians off with their own cash. It turns out Sudan doesn't want Canadian peacekeepers trying to stop them from raping and murdering their own citizens, Omar Hassan al-Bashir having less interest in seeing King Paul stay in power than, say, Dalton McGuinty.

And if we thought it would be that easy all along, just sending a few troops over to help the African Union, why didn't we do it a long time ago. I'm sure HRH King Paul I will pretend that he is surprised by this turn of events. He has tried his best to help the people of Darfur, but the mean Sudanese aren't having it. You can't blame him. But the government had to know all along that Sudan wouldn't be welcoming the Canadian military with open arms. Now Paul can say he tried his very best, but things didn't work out. This was dirty politicking from day one.

Every day I think they have sunk about as low as they can go. But using the misery and despair of Africa to help you stay in power Paul. I have to say "Bravo", because you have surprised even jaded Bitter Lemon with the depths to which you will sink. I'm starting to agree with the rest of Canada. You might just deserve the position of PM because you clearly want it so badly.

Election Fraud in Britain?

Zimbabwe TV is accusing the British government of voter fraud in last week's election.

Sure, Zimbabwe might be spiraling out of control, but you have to give Mugabe credit for keeping us constantly entertained.

Do you think there's an election coming?

In the past two weeks I have received two pieces of mail from my MP Tony Ianno (addressed directly to "the Varley household" which makes me want to either change my name or move...). So if there was any doubt that there was an election coming....

The first piece of mail included a copy of Tony's speech in parliament, perhaps offered as evidence that he showed up to work one day? (if you haven't witnessed Tony explain that it is not really necessary, you won't know what a special event this is).

Today's piece of mail documents how the Liberals are using my money to buy my vote. First of all my money is to be spent looking after other people's children, because financing megahomes and SUVs leaves little money over for childcare. Raise your own damn kids!

$171 million will be spent over the "next five years to celebrate Canada and help Canadian diversity find its voice in communities across the country".... think the sponsorship scandal only spread out over all 10 provinces.

But amidst the $60 million each being given to fight the evil Sea Lamprey and keep quality CBC documentaries that teach me about the evils of the nation to the south of us on the air (you just know the Sea Lamprey is American!), the $688 million being given to the Tommorow Starts Today (no, it doesn't) art and cultural package (it's probably best I don't know what this is), the $2.1 billion on health care that they will be spending to "reduce waiting times" in Ontario (which should not be confused with the $194 million on medical equipment ... forgive me but aren't the two related?... are they double counting? I guess I just don't really get how they specifically direct funds to reducing waiting times, isn't it related to other things?) , the best is the $100 million being given to Ford of Canada and the $207 "investment" in Pratt and Whitney, because of all the welfares, corporate is my favourite. Aren't you glad that you work hard every day to give your money to the poor folk at Ford? Doesn't it make you want to vote Liberal?

Is someone really reading this and thinking it is a program they want to get behind? Really? Personally, I think Tony ('Yanno' if you're in the know 'Eye-anno' to the rest of us) would do himself a lot more good if he just sent around a mailing saying "I've been doing this for so long that I have no marketable skills. If I don't get re-elected I'll be unemployed". Go for the sympathy vote!

At last!

Do you feel like certain voices aren't being represented by the mainstream media? Do you feel like the New York Times, the Washington Post and CNN show only one perspective on the world? Well, today all of that is over because Arianna Huffington's group blog "The Huffington Report" has begun. Finally, all of Arianna's big name Hollywood friends will have a forum for their voice. Hopefully this will just be the start of the trend and someone will find Bono a bully pulpit for his views on AIDS and Third World Debt Relief or Tom Cruise/John Travolta on their beliefs on Scientology. Maybe one day Michael Moore may even find a place for his opinion. But for today you will have to settle for such silenced voices as Laurie David (Larry's annoying wife), Julia-Louis Dreyfuss and her husband Brad Hall (what, no Jerry Seinfeld?!), Mike Nichols, John Cusack, Ellen Degeneres and Davids Mamet and Frum. Finally their opinions will be heard!

It's not that I object to Arianna starting a megablog and inviting all her big name friends to join in. After all, what is America about if not self-promotion? It's that she actually pretends this thing is going to offer a new perspective.

"The Huffington Post is going to be two things. Its really taking the two things that worked great on the Internet—which is news and the blogosphere—and combining them, bringing to the Internet voices that haven’t been there, as well as voices that are there. I’ve believed for a while now that some of the most interesting things are happening online and yet many of the very interesting people haven’t been a part of the online conversation."

Warren Beatty and Gwyneth Paltrow have been left out of the discussion for too long. Thank you Arianna!

Thank you

Thousands of people turned out in the Netherlands today to honour the Canadian troops who freed their country from the Nazis 60 years ago. It is at times like this that we are reminded that the freedom we take for granted was not won easily. The Canadian military played an important role in fighting fascism in Europe.

As much as people like to talk these days about Canada's role in the world as peacekeepers, our soldiers earned a reputation as brave fighters during the wars of the 20th Century. We should not forget this side of our history. While not dismissing the work that soldiers have done as peacekeepers throughout the world, it is important to acknowledge that Canada has not traditionally been a pacifist nation and did not shy away from a fight when it was necessary.

Many thousands of Canadians gave their lives defeating the forces of tyranny. We all -- not just Europeans -- owe them our thanks.

Zimbabwe will keep us in check

Have your Human Rights been violated? Don't worry, Zimbabwe is on the case! Yes, everyones favourite former hope for a continent turned impoverished dictatorship has been re-elected to the UN's Human Right's Commission. The Commission, which exists mostly to scoff at those whose human rights are being violated, is currently populated by such fine nations as Sudan (who will defend your human right to commit genocide any day of the week), Cuba (who needs freedom when you've got a high literacy rate?), and China ('cos Tiannanmen was like 16 years ago, so get over it).

The reason you have to love Zimbabwe though is because they're so brazen. Quoth Zimbabwe's ambassador to the UN: "Those who live in glass houses should not throw stones." That's right, stone throwing should only be done outdoors, at those standing in line to vote in national elections. With insights like these the oppressed of the world can rest easy.

Now somebody please remind me again why I was fine to go into Iraq without UN approval?

I want an election and I want it NOW!

So the despicable piece of filth that calls himself our Prime Minister has decided to cancel his trip to Holland because he has decided to govern like a tin-pot dictator who can't leave the country for fear of a coup.

King Paul was supposed to be going to Holland to honour the Canadian men who fought and gave their lives liberating the country from the Nazis. But then he realised, what the fuck, most of them are dead and the rest of them too old and sick to make it to the polls on election day anyway, so who gives a rats ass about them?

I realise that the Liberals don't think that Canada has a role in the world other than mouthing off occassionally, as they proved by dismantling our military. But could they not at least still pay homage to our proud past as a nation that fought against tyranny. You know, at least while some of those who gave their youth and risked their lives to fight for our country are still alive. Is it too much to ask?

In trying to save his government, he has proven once and for all that he is not fit to govern.

Bitter Lemon's Response to King Paul's Address To the Nation

I realise that my response comes a few hours later than those of Stephen, Gilles and Jack. For that you can blame Blogger, which was down earlier this evening.

My fellow Canadians, mesdames et monsieurs, tonight I want to tell you something that was not said by any of the party leaders: this whole damn mess is your fault. I feel about as sorry for Canadians as I do for someone who gives out their credit card number to the guy on the phone who says you've won a vacation and will just need your information to hold your reservation. You fell for their bullshit and now you must pay. Unfortunately for me, you bastards gave them my credit card number too. You elected a party whose one and only goal is getting and staying in power. And then you re-elected them. And then you figured, hey what the hell, everyone knows Visa picks up the tab when it's fraud, we'll elect them one more time.

But Bitter Lemon, that's not fair: for most of that time -- if not all of it -- the other parties were a total and utter mess. You're right, they were/are. And guess what? That's your fault too. Why? Because, let's face it, you don't care. The last attempt that this country had at a political conversation was the Charlottetown Accord and even then most people didn't really understand the details of what they were voting for in the referendum. That apparently exhausted us and, despite the fact that we've had three elections since then, no one has really seemed very fussed. One of our provinces nearly left and it didn't even lead to a discussion about who we are as a nation. We've spent over a decade talking about who is most commited to maintaining the status quo when it comes to health care. I can't possibly think why the Liberals felt like they could steal our money without anyone noticing.

Personally, I think the most telling part of Paul Martin's speech was when he pointed out that he practically lived on Parliament Hill, as his dad was a cabinet minister in 4 Liberal governments (at first I thought he was asking us to excuse his behaviour, like a repentant wife abuser who grew up in an abusive home; but then I realised he was proud: "I smacked my bitch up real good last night".) Paul Martin has wanted to be Prime Minister his entire life. And basically the response of Canadians wasn't, 'maybe we should find someone who has a vision for the nation', but, 'gee, he seems to want it so bad, how can we say no to him now? He's waited so long for it'. And just as Paul got what he always wanted he is in danger of losing it without even having had a chance to make a name for himself as Prime Minister. And he's flailing because he doesn't know what to do. Because, despite his ability to figure out 'just stay close to Parliament Hill and they'll give you the reins eventually', he now seems genuinely concerned that he won't be able to talk his way out of this one.

And even though there is nothing I would like more than to see this man fall on his face, I'm going to give him some advice. Keep up with the scary-conservatives-will-come-to-power/
separatists-going-to-tear-apart-the-country line. Why? Not because Canadians are really all that worried about either of these scenarios, but because both of these things will involve serious political discussion and that is all very tiring and Canadians just don't want to hear it and are willing to just vote Liberal to make it stop. Ssshhh, Idol is on (that's the kind of election Canadians can get behind!).

Now, I must confess, I'm giving this advice to Paul for my own ends. It's kind of a social experimment. Sorry Canadians, but I want to see just how politically apathetic we can get as a nation before it all goes to hell. Like, will a province or two have to separate or will it just be that the boomers will get really old, need serious medical care and not be willing to put up with mediocre services available to them? ('cos, as we all know, seniors have nothing better to do so they vote). I guess only time will tell.

And may God continue to bless socialised medicine.

We have Pope!

Ratzinger. No real surprise there I suppose. Benedict XVI.

Let's just hope it doesn't result in a run of babies called Benedict.

Toronto Star gears up for an election

Well, clearly the Star thinks an election call is just around the corner, 'cos it's time to rev up the Tory bashing into high gear. A headline on the Star's website:

'Tories flip-flop on Kyoto climate deal'

The point of the article? That the Liberal government has released the rather vague details of Canada's Kyoto commitment to mixed reviews. Oh, and by the way, now that it's ratified the Tories have accepted that they can't get out of it. I'd say they selected the most appropriate headline. No?

Don't worry, even though the Tories are coming to forcibly impregnate you (and, apparently much to the Star's chagrin, make you accept a bullshit treaty that the Star believes in), the Liberals will protect you:

"...Liberal ministers sounded confident they'll be around to implement
the plan despite their government's current precarious position.
'Canada will do its share for the planet because that is our responsibility,'
said Environment Minister Stephane Dion."

Golly gee, aren't the Liberals swell? They want to protect the planet and save the world! I say we all gather at Olympic Stadium in Rimouski and hold a rally for them!

Don't let the bastards get you down.... oh wait, you are the bastards

It's taken me a while, but I think I've finally decided on my absolute favourite thing about politics in this country. I know what you're thinking: "How could you possibly narrow it down, there are so many things: the depth of the debate, like how you can preface anything with 'American-style' to define it as bad and hide behind 'Charter Rights' (as if Canadians actually care) when you don't want to admit your actual opinion on something; the wide range of issues discussed from health care to health care and back again; the fact that you vote for an individual, not a party, but their opinion doesn't count because party line is totally where it's at; and the fact that we have a minority government but the Prime Minister still acts like he's God on high."

And you're right, those are all wonderful things about our nation's politics. But at the end of the day -- at the federal level -- I think I'm going to have to go with the fact that the Liberals have been in office for over a decade but they still act like the victimised ones. The mean opposition threatening to call an election over a little thing like the sponsorship scandal! “Obviously, if Stephen Harper and the Bloc Québécois are going to come together to force an election, there's going to be an election,” concedes King Paul. (I love how they never refer to the Conservatives, but rather 'Stephen Harper', ooh, the evil Stephen Harper, the man who is going to make you have eight children and take away a woman's one and only choice in this world -- except that he has repeatedly said that he is not and it would never fly in Canada... but I digress).

You see Your Highness, you did not win a majority of the vote, despite how hard you tried to scare everyone into voting for you last time around (do not vote NDP or you'll get Stephen Harper... did you not read/see the Handmaid's Tale people? STEPHEN HARPER!!!) And now the dirty little secrets about your dirty little scheming party are coming out and Canadians aren't impressed. Well, if we're being honest, most Canadians aren't really paying any attention, which is why we're in this sorry mess in the first place. But I'll leave that for another day.

The thing about the parliamentary system is that if you don't get the majority of the seats you can't govern like a dictator like your predecesor. So, yes, it sucks for you that you have to deal with the fallout from his corrupt 'little guy from Shawinigan' ways, but it sucks for me that I have to live with a Liberal government at the provincial and federal levels. And you're the one who chose to jump into bed with these power-hungry ideology-free politicians in the first place (by the way, I didn't mean ideology free as a compliment... politicians should have political principals). So please stop trying to come off as the victim in all of this. The criminals in this case are not the people that are trying to 'force' an election... the criminals are the people who took my hard earned dollars and ... well, you tell me what they did with it (no seriously, if I promise not to publish it, will you? Promise!).

Go on then arrest me

So would this constitute breaching the publication ban?

I couldn't really plead not guilty, since I do have comtempt for the court. Silly courts, don't they understand that nobody is paying attention anyway? So what if the government squandered our money padding the pockets of their buddies in Quebec.... we weren't using it anyway!

R.I.P Karol

Though not a Catholic, I really liked Pope John Paul II. The role he played in the fall of communism in Eastern Europe cannot be denied, and for that alone he earned a place as one of the great moral leaders of the 20th century.

I went to see him at World Youth Day in Toronto two years ago, which I suppose puts me among the millions who the media keeps saying he 'met' during his papacy. Given the size of the park, my distance from the stage and, of course, the fact that I am not a believer, I can't honestly say that I took anything away from my experience with the pope. But I respected the fact that, despite his state of poor health at the time, he made the journey to Toronto. It will be interesting to see if the next pope continues in his tradition of travelling the world.

He has been pope since the year I was born, so it is weird to think that there will be somebody else in the role. It is unlikely that any other pope could have as much of an impact on the world at large as Karol Wojtyla. He will be missed.

Can somebody please explain?

As expected, Jeremy Hinzman, who deserted the U.S. army after realising it wasn't just an opportunity for a free education, but actually involved obligations, has been denied refugee status in Canada. After the decision, he spoke at an anti-war rally held outside the U.S. consulate in Toronto.

What I don't understand is how the anti-war types can support him anyway. While I'm sure that there are plenty of people in this country opposed to the war in Iraq who have supported other U.S. military actions in the past, one suspects that these aren't the same people who are outside the consulate with the Bush=Fascist signs. Those are the people who oppose all U.S. military action. How do they excuse supporting a man who was willing to sign up to fight for the imperialist cause, even if he didn't specifically know he was going to have to go to Iraq?

Just asking.

One woman I'd like to see beaten up and humiliated....

Maureen Dowd feels that our culture likes to abuse strong women, as she puts it: "Arabs put their women in veils. We put ours in the stocks." (If it's such a tough life being a New York Times columnist, might I recommend a move to Saudi Arabia?). First we like to put them down and "[a]fterward, in a gratifying redemption ritual, people like to see the battered women be rewarded."

But Maureen Dowd doesn't play these kinds of games. No, she stands up for strong women. Women who faced sexism and racism growing up in the American south in the 1960s to become Secretary of State...

"And what about Condi, who's now being touted for the Republican ticket in 2008? Perhaps she does not need to play the victim to make people feel better about her power because she was never seen as a termagant, pushing people around and bending them to her will. She always seemed subservient to President Bush and Vice President Dick Cheney, a willing handmaiden and spokesman for their bellicose bidding."

Because if a women doesn't have suitable liberal cred, she is "subservient" and "a willing handmaiden" (interesting that she's not a 'spokesperson'). And I'm sure these are exactly the same terms that she would use to describe a man with whom she disagreed. It's so amusing watching the feminists frothing at the mouth over Condi. She is a legitimately strong woman who has worked her way up to one of the most powerful positions in the world, but they take every opportunity to bash her. Because they don't know how to deal with her. In the modern era, a woman is allowed to be anything... except a conservative (as we all learned during the last election the only Republican women are "security mom's"). And as a conservative black woman she has committed a double sin. Men are free to base their politics on any number of factors. But women? We have to vote with our vaginas.

Happy belated International Women's Day!

That's right rest of Canada, we really are the Centre of the Universe

An interesting composite of Toronto.

Change bad

It was inevitable... The popular movement in Lebanon has brought down the pro-Syrian government this week. Syria is a Baathist state that essentially controls Lebanon. So clearly, the people of Lebanon asserting themselves is a bad thing and using this as an opportunity to redefine Syria's role in the region would be even worse. Kicking the Syrians out of Lebanon would be reckless. Afterall, why should the Lebanese have sovereignty? (sovereignty only matters when you're looking for an excuse not to stop a genocide) This could shake things up in Syria, and given how well things are going there, surely that would be disastrous. So what is the solution?

In the end, the most promising (if gradual) course for promoting reform in Syria is to engage and empower Mr. Assad, not to isolate and overthrow him.

You know, I am so sick to death of the perspective that we should be nice to dictators and treat them well when they behave a little less badly. Has it ever worked? And will somebody please explain to me what is so freakin' wonderful about the status quo that we need to maintain it? You know for a fact that the same people who are urging caution now were the same one's who were urging caution just before the Berlin Wall fell. I wonder what it's like to be consistently on the wrong side of history. Learn your lesson and shut up!

I love a Friday with someone new to hate

It is people like Michael Gorman that make me question my decision to become a librarian. Trapped in a bygone era and desperately clinging to the idea that they are not becoming obsolete. Surely if information is important, it must take you a long time to find it and will require the help of someone with special letters after their name. Right?

The man actually suggests that it is better to read a book in book form than in digitized format. And belittles bloggers who disagree with him. It is certainly my preference to read words off the printed page, but please do not suggest that the quality of information is somehow better just because trees had to die to get it into your mind.

The fact that he admits that he didn't really know about blogs until 2004 says about all that needs to be said. As an information professional, it really is your responsibility to know about new media. You don't have to like it, but you certainly can't revel in your ignorance and expect the respect of intelligent people.

"It is obvious that the Blog People read what they want to read rather than what is in front of them and judge me to be wrong on the basis of what they think rather than what I actually wrote. Given the quality of the writing in the blogs I have seen, I doubt that many of the Blog People are in the habit of sustained reading of complex texts. It is entirely possible that their intellectual needs are met by an accumulation of random facts and paragraphs. In that case, their rejection of my view is quite understandable."

I ain't never read none of them there complicated texts. Them books sure do gots lots of words. Thank the lord for the Drudge Report or I don't know how I'd get my news. It's hard for me to read the newspaper 'cos all the drool dropping from my mouth smudges the ink.

And clearly he is judging the 'blog people' by what they have written, rather than by what he thinks, which accounts for the fact that he has not just lumped an entire group of people into the category of idiots because he happens to not like the format in which they choose to share information. Because that would be the reaction of a mindless idiot!!

This is the mentality of the president of the American Library Association. He also thinks that Google should put the money they have been using to digitize and make searchable some of the contents of the world's great libraries -- to make them accessible to all of mankind -- into providing libraries for the poor children of California. Well, Mr. Gorman, if you're that concerned about those children rent a van, get some books and drive through the streets of East L.A. Do not presume to tell Google how to spend it's money. And I'm not sure who it is that insisted that the quality of your writing was such that it deserved to be in print. But perhaps you should get a second opinion.

It is fair to say that I hate this man and everything that he and his Castro loving organisation stand for. And somehow I doubt that next time someone asks me for information I will respond "let me just Universal Bibliographic Control that for you."

I am posting this to the internet now, without an editor or a censorship board (sorry Fidel).

via Instapundit