Stephen!

First point: How cute is it going to be, First Ladies Laura and Laureen? For that alone, Harper had to win tonight.

But this is what happens when you let the West in: Victory speeches after 1 a.m. We should elect more leaders from Quebec.

-He speaks English first! Typical Albertan, pandering to the majority.

-Ooh, he just mentioned the prayers of supporters. Ladies and Gentleman, we now officially live in a theocracy.

-You'll note that Paul wasn't included in the list of leaders running 'honourable' campaigns. He doesn't want to start off by lying to the public.

- Canada: "sovereign, strong, free and united"? Fascist!

- Wow, that's the longest a Canadian leader has gone without mentioning healthcare. I think he might have made it past 10 minutes.

- He just abandoned Canada! "Made in Ottawa solutions don't work"? Since when?!

- He acknowledged our soldiers in Afghanistan. Finally we get a leader who respects the armed forces.

God Bless Canada!